He started to stagger forward a week before his first birthday about two months ago. He is a true ‘Boy’ and not a baby anymore. He now has many teeth and he likes using them. I’ve always been very pleased with his appetite and his non-fussy guzzling but in the bath last night

I noticed that his stomach was rather large and his face was fairly round with a very sweet, cherubic double chin. I find him very attractive but I don’t want to turn him into a porker for his own sake, he’ll never forgive me if he’s too fat to get a girlfriend later. Maybe I’m thinking ahead just a little too far!

He’s proud of his tummy as he’s always pointing it out and laughing. I laugh when he bends right down to see his willy between his legs because his stomach’s so large.

He can say "door", "du"(duck), "no", "ca"(car) and of course "dede"(daddy) and "Mum mum"(mummy). He understands a lot. He can point out most parts of his body and when I’m in the bath and he’s standing beside it, throwing everything in, I pass time by asking him where things are in the bathroom which he enjoys because I shriek with praise when he gets it right and he feels very clever.

He has a new car with a bubble roof which Granddad bought from Toys Are Us. He loves it passionately. I have to drag it through the streets of Shoreham while he sits holding the steering wheel, every so often twisting it vigorously, thinking he’s driving it. His expression is one of morose concentration. In fact passersby probably think I’ve forced him in it for a good time, little do they know that he gives me hell when I try to take him out!

It makes an embarrassingly loud trundling noise with the plastic wheels on the tarmac and often frightens old ladies when we approach them from behind, one actually crossed over the road and stopped and stared at us suspiciously as we passed. As I walk ahead trying to look innocent, and not like I want to murder them with a large plastic toy,

I look down at his fixed expression the same as before and a wave of love overcomes me, he’s so small and daft and yet he behaves like he’s king surveying his kingdom. Little did I know when I was a strutting teenager that I would walk these same streets as an obedient servant later in life and actually like it!

31.3.97 (my birthday)

On bank holiday Monday we went to the beach as it was a beautiful day. Hannah, the Boy’s sister, came too.

Hannah is nearly ten, she lives with her mum most of the time and comes round to ours every other weekend. Before Sam was born we all hoped that Hannah would like him and not feel second best and so we focussed our attention on her feelings towards him. We didn’t notice the true nature of their relationship developing until it had become glaringly obvious.

To our surprise Sam had eyes only for his sister and was trying to seduce her. She however was not interested in babies and read her Beano and Dandy totally ignoring The Boy.

His seduction technique was a little crude, but it worked! He just ripped the comics out of her hands and started laughing his head off. She became annoyed and angrily cursed him pulling them in front of her face again. Not in the slightest deterred he did it again and again and fell all over her until it became infectious and she laughed too.

Hannah was the one who discovered he likes slapstick, skipping along the pavement she tripped over which he found so funny he choked with laughter. He also finds it hysterical when I accidentally bash the lampshade with flailing arms when I am dancing.

The beach was beautifully misty and sunny, the sea glinted in the diffused light and young lads dug for bait. We spread out our rug and got out the wine and crisps. The Boy loved walking on the sand and throwing stones and digging his hands into the sand. We built a sand castle and went paddling, The Boy sat in the sea with all his clothes on and got excited by the waves that came up to his tummy, my ankles!

When we came home we had another bottle of wine and The Boy played with the sandy ball and spades with a bowl of water in our small, patio garden. Hannah drew the Spice Girls on Photoshop while singing along to the CD.

In the evening we went out to a restaurant with friends for my birthday and left Sam with Ben’s parents. Apparently he was good and watched a programme on horse jumping. He wasn’t so good when I tried to put him to bed because he was angry that I had taken him away from the breast…very angry. I only feed him at bedtime now.

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